Listening, really listening is one of the most important skills we can master, and is often one for which we get little direct instruction. Success in our relationships-- work, school and family--hinge on how well we receive information from others. With your child at school we're focusing on what listening behaviors look like. The skill steps we are teaching are:

LISTENING

1. Look at the person who is talking.

2. Sit quietly -- don't fiddle with other things.

3. Think about what is being said.

4. Say "yes" or nod your head. Listening may also sound like:

"Oh, really. . ."
"Ummm. . ."
"OK"

5. Ask questions about the topic to find out more.
"What did it look like?"
"How did that make you feel?"
"Tell me more about _____."

So, how can parents become involved? Practice the Listening steps at home. Seriously! Make some time (hard as it is!) to be with your child and model what good listening looks and sounds like. Turn off the TV, put down the newspaper, stop a chore for just a few minutes and have a talking/listening exchange with your child. Ask for feedback from him/her -- "How am I doing?"

CHALLENGE FOR PARENTS:
Take the quiz that follows and see if you know your child as well as you think. On a piece of paper, answer each question as though your child were answering it. Then have your child answer each question on the form. If your child is too young, read the questions out loud -- but no coaching! When you're both finished, compare answers. . .talking and listening. Don't be surprised if you match only five or six times; more than eight is great. Have fun!

-- Chris Owings

"Getting to Know Them" Parents' Quiz

1. My favorite TV show is _______________________________________.

2. What I like best about myself is ________________________________.

3. My favorite thing to eat for supper is _____________________________.

4. My favorite color is ______________________.

5. Other children think I'm ______________________________________.

6. My favorite song is __________________________________________.

7. What I like best about my mother is _____________________________.

8. My best school subject is ______________________________________.

9. My favorite video game is ______________________________________.

10. When I have to work around the house, I __________________________.

11. What I like best about my father is ______________________________.

12. I like my teacher when _______________________________________.

13. My favorite movie is _________________________________________.

14. I think my bedtime should be ___________________________________.

15. When I have free time, I like to ________________________________.

16. When I grow up, I want to _____________________________________.

17. I like people who ____________________________________________.

18. What I would like to change about me is ___________________________.

19. I do not like people who _______________________________________.

20. If I had lots of money, I would _________________________________.