Busy lives, busy people! Not a lot of time for families to talk with each other. How about trying the Family Meeting? The Family Meeting is a regularly scheduled gathering of all the members of the family. Its purpose is to discuss ideas, values, complaints and to plan family work and play. The goal is communication and agreement! Family Meetings provide opportunities for:

· being heard.
· expressing positive feelings about one another and giving encouragement.
· distributing chores fairly among members.
· settling conflicts and dealing with recurring issues.
· planning family recreation.

Select a time for your weekly meeting when everyone can be present. . .an evening after dinner, Saturday morning, Sunday afternoon, or any time that works in your family. Avoid mealtimes. Those times are family social times! Decide how long you will meet and stay within those time limits.

Choose a "secretary" for you meetings to write down what was discussed and decided. . .great writing practice for your children. Choose a chairperson and rotate these positions so every member gets a chance to practice skills. Parents should model the communication skills of reflective listening, I-messages, and problem-solving. Some families se the "agenda" by taping a paper to the refrigerator door or bulletin board so during the week everyone can write items of concern to be discussed at the next meeting.

At each meeting:

· read minutes that report topics and decisions covered at the last meeting.
· discuss unresolved issues and/or decisions that may need to be changed.
· bring up new business and plan family fun.
· summarize points considered and be clear about commitments. . .who's doing what!

A Family Meeting is not a "gripe" session, but a resource for solving problems. Try to see and understand each other's points of view. When progress on a concern is blocked, pinpoint the real issue; do not be sidetracked by side issues such as a chore or specific event. Focus on what the group can do rather than on what any one member should do. Sometimes that's hard to do when just beginning Family Meetings, so go slowly and be careful of everyone's feelings.

Remember, all members participate as equals. Take time to recognize the good things happening in the family.

Encourage each other!